Poetry: Melody of Being Animate

14.02.17 | This bodies lover (HVD)

It’ll be morning soon, before you know it the mind has woken up long before the eyes have the chance to rise with the sun, the mouth is carefully unwrapping its words to make them as pretty as they can pronounce, its nearly perfect, inside I can feel the heart holding in its love until the right moment beats by, the two souls in this body have been told to behave n that if they become too playful they won’t get their surprise, so for now, they are patiently waiting, its too early, we’ll wait until this body has rested the mind, eased the heart n cautioned this body

It’s time, come closer

The mind takes me by my thoughts n softly announces that without me there would be no harmony to keep it bound, that without this kind of willful love it would be bound to anarchy, the mind broke down in apology for all the countless hurt, the pain n the over thinking it causes, sometimes it doesn’t understand where it is all coming from n is sorry for putting this kind of willful love in this kind of unpleasant mindful, I want you to please accept my love for you, the harmony you bring along side your immaculate compassion when it comes to the ways this mind has known chaos far too long, n for that, I want you to know without you, I would not know both the love n compation in this kind of harmony

Holding back my tears, I hear the heart beat faster

The heart takes me gently by my emotions n honestly expresses to me that without my love there was so much unpleasant, not being able to understand your emotions must have been very hard on you, you have done so well for yourself, I want you to be proud of that much, the way you choose to love others is something that you should beam n build in yourself first, bless, your love is the highest form of recovery when it comes to yourself, thank you for teaching me to choose love above unpleasant, even when my emotions want to salt water saturate, I’ve learnt the difference between balance, n imbalance quicker than I can befriend the ocean now, thank you for always doing your best when it comes to saving me

Letting my tears find release I cry for all the affection I never knew this body had kept hidden deeper than I could dare find it, I put my hands over my eyes to try n condense so many years of hurt into this kind of love, with blurred vision I can feel two souls carefully cares my back as they embrace me into their kind of love

The two souls wrapped around my body cry with me despite their playful, they kindly tell me how much they have missed my presence n are so glad I have grown to be this kind of woman, feeling their embrace they tell me how they have watched me heal, grow, learn, love, n create all in one lifetime, said that for each suicidal survived they were glad I chose to be alive, told me that, we have seen you bare through the pain all by yourself far too long n that you’re now teaching us so much that we didn’t recognize ourselves, said that without your nurturing nature we wouldn’t be this strong, you have taught us more than enough, so now it is our time to help teach back its gratitude

I closed my eyes even tighter not wanting to let go, I cried for all my insecurities some more, for all my hardships, for all the times I felt alone, for all the times I was alone, for all the times I was healing, for all the times I grew, n for the times I made lasting friendships, for the first time in my life I understood how empowering it felt to feel confident, to have people who love you back, to heal, learn n grow everyday, I cried so much, because

Thanks to that, for the first time in very long time

I am happy n proud to be writing this alive

I am happy to be loved, n I am happy to be alive

Its so warm here now I told them, n they said

Its all despite you.

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