Poetry: Melody of Being Animate

18.8.17 | Kind

Been rationally drowning self in understanding how it is you love someone and whether words that learn how to cut tongues and bind itself to narrative that live in the masquerades of awkward glances, side way smiles and pretty words, how we, are watching love move, and dip its self first, is this really love at all, capable of taking such an intensity by what you seek rather than what you see, I mean, if we really think about what it means to love someone beneath the surface of what is in our horizon and feel, one of the unambiguous confessions left honestly is what we seek, I’m not repeating about the way we configure tangibles and intangibles, I’m begging what varies, the in between instances where when we make a decision without a seconds thought, immediately play a mental monologue of what we think we saw in love, and there, caught in the gloss memoirs of what we seeked to begin with, in them, holding onto hidden between silver measures of their imperfections, reminding them and ourselves of how fragile we can all be, the human heart beating at each attempt, always, do we really know love at all, what Im really trying to say is a friend once told me, don’t be in a rush, and I remember looking at her and thinking, those are words I have memorized for myself before.

Poetry: Melody of Being Animate

18.8.17 | Care

The introverted mind, a consolation of masses that are too much to even ponder and what it really means when you’re watching the grey sky from inside of your bedroom window, a mental hereon of an illness that leaves you feeling the breeze from inside the body and learning to care about yourself even if its narcissistic, I’ve come to learn that even with all the pondering done there’s not much room left for taking a break, even so, there is a huge appreciation for silence which most would find softly uncomfortable, but when you’re this invested uncomfortable learns to settle into a kind of body and politely it becomes a survival thing, when you spend this much time with the mind and this kind body you pick up on care that is much deeper than what you may have previously composed, you also don’t like picking up phone calls, so often we forget that its okay to be our selves, its hard to remind a kind of existence that only knows what its been told is okay, and the way we unconsciously allow something that is not greater than us to set our kind of normal being, still, it is not our fault, need to learn ourselves to be kind to our own, and never be submissive or kind to a system that is not kind to you, said that we don’t have to be so strong all the time we don’t have to hide so much of ourselves just to please a temporary feeling, a temporary person, we’re always allowed to feel as valid as someone we love, because if it were them, this strange, you would be softer, kinder, and you would love them harder.

Poetry: Melody of Being Animate

24.5.17
UnexplainableΒ love (..healing..)

Unexplainable, how this outcome usually comes over flowing with so much state, no context to fix its now, a mess, a message from the body, unexplainable, how each trigger is a constant breakdown, how long will you last this time, an occurrence of memoirs, memories of bombastic emotion, years back, fast forward to now, all the after math leaving this body aching for more, no clear path way, the solutions are all hidden and I am left to find my way out without guidance, without instructions, how do you tame a natural disaster, wave its way into your being so deep, too deep twisted into this soul, watched and felt it make a wreck out of everything that is slowly learning to give it life, have to build it back up every time, can’t help its unexplained terror, the way it attacks this body is a plea for help, wanting to be noticed so it can be eased, the mind is calling to be settled, the body it hurting, can you feel the way it tenses up at public spaces watch you this body run from eyes even its own, so quick to miss mirrors, a reflection of what can beauty behold, can give to this body, in this state is it enough, are you enough so full on this feeling, having to watch it breakdown at its own solutions, running away from self is much harder than running away from others so we make alliance to keep sane, to feel other emotions other than the ones that have lived in this body for longer than we can even remember, do you remember, we chose not to let go, to understand how this body is trying to heal do you remember, how we promised not to give up, that each breakdown means one step closer to healing which means one step closer to self love, which means you’re healing, do you remember, I want you to close your eyes and remember, you’re worth all the effort, you were always worth all the effort, all this love, you’re worth all of it