Poetry: Melody of Being Animate

31.5.17 | 31.5.17
I want all of you (heart beats, unseen+seen..)

“I want all of you, the parts that make it feel like we are in a different world, escape this earth just for a moment, you tell me that communication is not as clear, so I tell you it has always been you, told you that I feel more when I am by your side, when you are not there to witness this heart beat and this body has longed for comfort in your words and hands since the day I met you, you tell me you like me back but I, wonder how strong is the feeling of such a replaceable word, you talk about two different realities as though they exist only through you and they do, you tell me I can come with you if I allow the walls I have built to crumble at our feet-, the most sexiest thing you have ever told me is, I want to get to know both you and your mind, before he could allow self to fully commit, it was at that moment I was sure you were the only person I could give everything without having to fear of letting go so easily, it has always been you, I have always wanted and waited for all of you, look what you’ve done..”

Poetry: Melody of Being Animate

28.5.17 – 29.5.17
Note to self: love can lie

Note to self, doesn’t care, only hears voices that speak with dipped in poison split tongues, you were warned, by body, eyes, narration marathons in the form of false actions, disillusioned, told you to watch out for mishaps in the blank spaces that don’t match motion, too loud, what we’re you looking at, looking for, imagine the strength is has taken for body to watch the heart break at so many double edged knifes, the body spoke with shards of glass tip pointed to the heart wept and called the heart a coward for not letting go of what will hurt this body reminding the heart that it beats to unseen too often blurred lines and broken truths, weak, the body begged to not be taken for granted too harshly, that you’re both soft and honest and that is the perfect bate for sharks that swim this close to the shore, you’re to choose you, never forget that praying for the hearts guidance in both compassion and care the body is both heal and hero, don’t know no in between catharsis this is strength that has been learnt and undone from unlearning masks before it allows them to be seen of too soft, pretty first

Poetry: Melody of Being Animate

26.5.17
can you really love anyone? (..him, me, you…)

He tells me he can love anyone, words that escape his mouth I’m not sure how aware he is of the context of love, that it grasps depth, we wave into conversation about something so tangible seeking its approval before we have found souls to match our definition of love, he says he can love anyone so I wonder what kind of love he has known, does he know the phrases it pronounces, that its more than just tangible, more than just a feeling that it demands the whole body-,

he whisks me up, I think love whispers sweet into your ears, gives new meanings to things we have and yet to experience-,

he kisses me and tells me the mood is lost so deep into conversation, I tell him nah this is hot-,

his words are flames that ignite this body, I tell him to keep tempting its flame and I wonder what kind of love his known-,

can you really love anyone, he said every one of us are capable of good, kind, love, warm, and I wonder does he love anyone, does he know what love means, what it feels like, how often does he watch it speak, can he find it in me too, are we really capable of loving anyone, he says he sees genuine good in everyone, can love anyone, and I think isn’t he right, we are all capable of loving so why is it that some of us choose not to love back, in a the most literal sense of more than us-,

soft hands grab and tease my sides-,

this earth, others, why is it that we don’t choose love even when love loves us back-, ambiguous, can you really love anyone?

Poetry: Melody of Being Animate

26.5.17
Black flower

I only see him, words that form out of his mouth like beautiful song he is song, melody so mesmerising how can you look away, when these kinds of lyrics escape their mouth its the closest sensation to what I imagine heaven to sound like, to feel like, like ain’t nothing as beautiful as your own words, the way you happy sugar canes into my heart, it reminds me of the word happy when I have misplaced it into your being, of all the beauty in this world you’re the most love, you’re the most happy, you make nothing else matter the way you care free this black joy, you have been beautiful song bloom from endless conversation and laughter enough to make everything else disappear, dear flower, thank you, for teaching me what it looks like to create, grow, love and be happy, more all in one melody.

Poetry: Melody of Being Animate

24.5.17
Unexplainable love (..healing..)

Unexplainable, how this outcome usually comes over flowing with so much state, no context to fix its now, a mess, a message from the body, unexplainable, how each trigger is a constant breakdown, how long will you last this time, an occurrence of memoirs, memories of bombastic emotion, years back, fast forward to now, all the after math leaving this body aching for more, no clear path way, the solutions are all hidden and I am left to find my way out without guidance, without instructions, how do you tame a natural disaster, wave its way into your being so deep, too deep twisted into this soul, watched and felt it make a wreck out of everything that is slowly learning to give it life, have to build it back up every time, can’t help its unexplained terror, the way it attacks this body is a plea for help, wanting to be noticed so it can be eased, the mind is calling to be settled, the body it hurting, can you feel the way it tenses up at public spaces watch you this body run from eyes even its own, so quick to miss mirrors, a reflection of what can beauty behold, can give to this body, in this state is it enough, are you enough so full on this feeling, having to watch it breakdown at its own solutions, running away from self is much harder than running away from others so we make alliance to keep sane, to feel other emotions other than the ones that have lived in this body for longer than we can even remember, do you remember, we chose not to let go, to understand how this body is trying to heal do you remember, how we promised not to give up, that each breakdown means one step closer to healing which means one step closer to self love, which means you’re healing, do you remember, I want you to close your eyes and remember, you’re worth all the effort, you were always worth all the effort, all this love, you’re worth all of it

Garden of Words Anime, RAW: Melody of Being Animate

22.5.17
Garden of words (RAW)

“..you speak to me so gently, like you’re touching something fragile, I’ve never told anyone this before, about a lot of things, do you think its too late for me?-, I wish the rainy season had never ended, I’ve always been here, stuck in the same place, its okay, we’re all human, we’ve all got our little quirks-. Him, I think this might, this might be, her, the happiest, them, time of my life-, him, I think I’ve fallen in love with you, her, together with you, in this garden of words..”

A TANKA: Garden of Words (Japanese Literature)

Narukami no sukoshi toyomite (A faint clap of thunder), sashi kumori (Clouded skies), Ame mo furanu ka? (Perhaps rain comes), Kimi wo todomemu (If so, will you stay here with me?), Narukami no sukoshi toyomite (A faint clap of thunder), furazu to mo (Even if rain comes not), warewa tomaramu (I will stay here), imoshi todomeba (Together with you).

なるかみの, すこしとよみて,
A faint clap of thunder,
さしくもり,
Clouded skies,
あめもふらぬか,
Perhaps rain will come.
きみをとどめむ?
If so, will you stay here with me?

なるかみの, すこしとよみて,
A faint clap of thunder,
ふらずとも,
Even if rain comes or not,
わはとどまらむ,
I will stay here,
いもしとどめば。
Together with you.

– Man’yōshū vol. 11, verse 2514 – 2513,
from the movie The Garden of Words –

Poetry: Melody of Being Animate

16.5.17

“how they can only remember how much good with this mouth lay on their skin, fixed to their tune, unwound you, disregard feelings of the mind, so quick to forget, silly, on purpose, don’t understand why this is become a recycled melody, the one you can’t stop playing, trying to understand its tunes will only make it hurt even more, let it go, you don’t need to hum so close to those who don’t want to understand your melody of being animate when it comes to the tuning of this mind, watch closely, can you see their off key isn’t in tune matched to yours, do you see it, look closely, do you see it now..”

Poetry: Melody of Being Animate

16.5.17

they will always come back, forget too often, silly, can’t understand how much good with this body wrapped with theirs, you’ll make the perfect melody together, they come and never forget to leave this broken song right after they finished admiring and appreciating your melody, this, it happens so often they mask their scent into your skin on purpose, silly, you forget to farewell their animate, don’t let there be a next time

Poetry: Melody of Being Animate

16.5.17

We cry too often for those who don’t glimpse memory of us, once twice, enough

Poetry: Melody of Being Animate

16.5.17

don’t get too close, I have this beautifully destructive way of burning things that keep me this kind of happy