Melody of Being Animate: Poetry

Ocean24 | 21.02.2024

My mind is racing and I am hearing what it looks like for eyes to begin to flood his office, I see the way he looks at my pacing hands I wonder if he can see my thoughts, I shake it off and answer his question, then he asks me about my life, asking how I like it breathing here, I tell him alive, I look into his eyes and ask him about my life he shrugs and asks my mind to stop calling for its name, to ask for help in ways he does not want to hear me speak, he wraps my mouth with what has been told to him even though he knows nothing about my mind he tells me to stop complaining, said am I always this impulsive about my environment I tell him yes, asked do you always just get up and leave I say yes, he asked me if I was anxious, as though he could see me avoiding his eyes because they lied to me as soon as I stepped foot into the room not meant for me, he called me dramatic and asked for my evidence, I froze and told him that when I was 14, 15, 16, 17, 18 I needed help in school, explained to him I was always lost, I couldn’t figure out who was lying anymore and I could feel my body want to run, could never find my way to the same answers as my class mates so I learned to stay silent, when I was 15 I was told to put that book down, I was questioned about my understanding standing up head down I could create oceans about how the education system has failed to teach me, I was left behind or laughed at I felt helpless for myself, my home was a wreck I quickly learned to keep her safe and this is when I first met my masked self, I took a deep breath and said nothing, I watched him talk about me as though I didn’t just spill myself into his hands as he wrote his notes into the computer I remember thinking this is why I don’t talk to you people about it, I left that empathy and cried about doing something good for my home only to cry about how my health was mishandled, checking my body to see if she is okay she was not so we cried together until it stopped, then we promised our home to not give up our mind. She deserves her peace, too, even after all this time.

Melody of Being Animate: Poetry

22.5.23 |Affirming my reality is my superpower.

In my second world, I look however I want, there are no boundaries to my being, and I am living freely. I am living spirited and in lights, I am feeling the waves move through my body I can feel again, –I am allowed to feel again–, I am free here, I am relieved of all the earthy pressures I am in dihurnment to myself and my way of life, I see how we live here nowadays, I do not wish it upon any of you, I see how we scurry, how we drown, the way we perform to cheat the mind to air out the heart unattended because it does not fit the pressures of the world you have created for it’s vitality. You’re responsible for her heart. ‐She bleeds more water and you watch her drown in her own sea, there are fires about these stories, there is nothing left to survive in the second world we choose life over things we canot touch, in this world we do not settle our hearts we release its chains and watch them save the mind, here we encourage our body to understand its cells and make connections with its reality we do not form aliances out of favours we grant them for ourselves because we understand how the laws here work–.

–I am my most freest light here, I do not command anything. I make choices that aline to my greatest garden and I make moves–, I follow my path earnestly, I am ambitious about my soul and she watches our body grow from the experiences we have had the pleasures of becoming, we see clearly, we accept abundantly, we move freely, we are accepting of letting it all go, we do not hesitate our power anymore for those who choice to only see parts they have misunderstood in our body for their own pleasures, –this is not for us to decide–. Our power has a much grander cause of demand in justice and compassion. –I am as calm as tress, I am as calm as the water, I am, ease–.

Melody of Being Animate: Poetry

14.3.23 | Love meets Loving.

I haven’t written about her since our last conversation with blood since we walked away from our light to face our shadow since we blindfolded our mind(s) to the world and shut inwards. We haven’t felt this world since we were reunited with our second, our heart has missed our care and sensitivity to self, our mind has been busy learning to unlearn itself and together we are teaching her about free will, she has waited o long to be here. –I don’t think we have met. My name is divergent. It’s nice to finally be seen.– Realizing your mind has never looked this loving, it has never looked this respected we have found our respect for self and are passing it down to the generation of our trauma in this world and the second, we are actualising a life we have known in the second home and finally living in its light, we are not ashamed of our intelligence we are not suffocating our spirit and we are intentionally unconditionally-zing our life of choice, we have worked on our body in this home long and honest, we have trusted her path for us and she has held our hand through every hurt, we are no longer giving chances to those who do not present with empathy, love, respect, boundaries, gratitude, and many more extensions of a successful life. We are living a successful life. We have lived past each day, and our mind has suffered silent battles, and we have held her hand through every breakdown. We are her first love. We have fallen in -love with ourselves again.–

Melody of Being Animate: Poetry

To the greatness of us all. | 5.1.22

To the nights where my mind is filled with more ache than thoughts, I tell her I will hold her for however many times she needs she is needed here our home together just like this and much more, I comfort her with my dreams we watch the two sun’s rise to remind us we have always also been the sun’s in our lifetimes, we sit in silence listening to the air make soft music creating notes into our home that soothe us here in this dream life, — when I wake find my mind in her solitude I am reminded of our bodies freedom, how each pulsed thought shares some of its truth here before it leaves our home, our air has always been fire proof we have been working with the new gifts for the purpose of moments of pure clarity on what to do with the idea that you have to be at your most welcomed self belief in love with you and I hope you find what time is to you about this memory. — affirm that you can, you will and you can, give yourself grace, you have to be willfully mindful of these paths they are made to cross create a life worthy of your help on a continuum, the choice is always yours for the seizing.

Melody of Being Animate: Poetry

Prosper. (Gods speed) | 5.1.22

So I’m sitting here juice mixed thinking about the currency in which we possess to thrive our lives, and I can’t help but feel as though my polymer needs to learn to work for me to the speed of my heart, my passion for a home has alway been my way of life, it has kept me safe in thinking the keep for independence and wellness will keep me alive long enough to see my inner peace. Like could you imagine what it would be like, —to wake to a dream that has been manifested to be built upon your own, I mean have you heard about how the stars are lights in the sky, have you seen the moon drop down to your eye level and you stare at each others light thinking I knew one day that this day would come I would be here and we would talk in light.— I can’t sleep, the insomniac in me is ragging with so much phenomena I can not contain her dragon breath no longer, —she is back with all her valour she thinks to have found a way to our dreams some more, thinks she can feel it in our eyes, see it in our heart and bend it in our mind;— she has woken from her sleep, and is ready to take on yet another the same way she skips to step to the beat of her own strum; We haven’t seen flowers lately nor rainbows for that matter, the best we have done is —be the rain our element has never been shy about her passing to the next future—, we crave this chance the same way the rain begs at our feet. Keep safe, na tuta onanana as we set mission intention in more —Prosperity.

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Entry #17 Covid has me unemployed after being employed and Im trying to get myself yet through another chance and restoring my livelihood when it is being threatened. How are you all doing?

So I just lost my full time job because I put in my resignation for my current full time job due to covid my timing could not have been anything but perfect, can you hear the sarcasm in my typing. I had a long drive from work today thinking about how life makes it possible to have so many fall backs and lessons with your own mental therapy about an outcome you so deliberately planned for, thinking about how this sounds so familiar back in 2019 dragged until 2020 and not until that year toward the middle I finally found ripe security in something I had wanted for myself so bad, I had worked so hard I deserved this chance. I was driving home from work today after what felt like a long shift thinking I worked so hard to get back to right where I began and for the first time in my life of downfalls I could not cry about it. My mentality lead me to lead us out of this mess the only way I grew to know how and that was with my strength to never give up on myself. I told me myself “I will never give up on who I am becoming and never give up on myself now. I have been hurt and down this rabbit hole of despair I will not fall for its old tricks again or at all I am better than this, I know I can get myself out of anything if I really wanted to so here I am getting myself out of yet another attempt and my livelihood.”

This is to us, those who once had a job and are now struggling with how the pandemic has handled our livelihoods. This is to us, we will make it out of this too I strongly believe in myself and I strongly believe in us, we have got this no matter how you look at this we have got this, no matter how it feels we have got this, there is always opportunity wherever you look, keep going this is no time to stop. Take some time to ease your body, soul and spirt about this, and as you’re calming down, adapt get yourself back to where you belong and that is being the best version of yourself for who you’re becoming to be.

Fatma.

Melody of Being Animate: Poetry

Drawing to stay alive. | 13.8.21

As it gets closer to my birth right I hear the sun through my skin, I can feel the change is near she is invited, she carries her optimism as her secret weapon so that when you see nervous she wills herself here the most, ,—a cunning nature that is vulnerable to the seeing eyes say those who do not see the whole of me have no worth to see me at all, —tell them to watch themselves as they spill right in-front of you say how careless are we to think a better version of ourselves dare you a heart too, dare you a mind that has learnt to skin alive she will peel back your layers you are layered, did you know this when you broke you lips to speak in poison? That each parts of self has soul so that begs each mouth to be the reckoning of legacy be the part where you first witnessed yourself glory be the sky you are the sky, this is your story to tell. —So tell me baby rain, when was the last season you first fell stumbled and picked your soul back up, we have to remind ourselves everyday who we are is plenty becoming and plenty sunflower, see the light ambers it shines deep into the fate of her eyes destiny she is your legacy to leave this earth and travel to the moon least once and back say—, have you heard of the ocean and how she swallows you whole like the way the sky and the ocean could hold the same space learn your deepest of desires make you smirk at you, seeing a sea reflection into these parts of the world, how they travel magically familiar into one another, have you seen this happen before; tell me, do you know what I mean?; please tell me you know what I mean? I have lived a many life’s and all have never been my first nor my last they have lived as I have became to live them and outlive them our past selves are travellers, and our future souls are to bare witness of the metamorphosis of our physical being hold prayer for our glory too, though soft to the touch this body has known much evil fire try to take her away from all that is good and well, again are we bodies reminded of our strength our power into us matched to our soul some more; shhhh can you hear the voices of intuition guiding your through this thought of mission too, we are purposeful beings there is nothing we are not capable of becoming even when we cry about our attempts enough to fill the sea her self, we come back to the ground just to reach the sky herself we revive as the rooted sunflower’s walking upon this land here in this form as we carry our voice as fruits of our labour too to say we did our best here, we will continue to become our greeted legacy even if it kills our past and ignites our future this is our dream, this is our story. — That’s quite enough of that from me, I’ve told you mine, now, won’t you share with me a part of your soul too?—

Fire in the Rain. By Fatma Hussein 2021

Poetry: Melody of Being Animate

20.3.21 | Character Play

This space we have created, for us, a field of sun flowers and tall trees with purple vined leaves filled with all the moon light, warm to the touch of our skin, we hold this inner world dear when we look up at the sky do we feel charged by light some more. You will hear about patience but can you never understand its light, until you have chosen to walk this path too. – When you come close to hearts like mind and mind like hearts do not be afraid of the character challenge it, feed it to play with you here, be at its peace, take soft steps while focusing on its unwavering mercy, she will gift you when you feel the most honest, when care is matched to vulnerability. Give fear the most permission and do not judge its way of finding you, a lot of the time when we are this high up we forget that we didn’t know it could also be this way, our keepsake, as shifting bodies to stay grounded no matter how close we are to our calling planets, it has always been our healing to know of our powers before we find the path to master its complexities. – Here, we get to fall in love differently, now, we give our body the permission to let in our soul. It hasn’t always been this easy to breath underneath our light matched to our darkness; Some have survived while others are still learning what this even means, we may not always feel inclined however, we are always deserving. Do not think you have fooled your breath only because you have fooled your body, do not think you have fooled your body only because you have fooled your soul; There has always been a greater force around us whether we live to admit it or otherwise, it is not all our paths to excel this, however, we are always welcomed enough to challenge this for our character in identity on this reality it begs at its roots here the most, being grounded is about noticing what your core to your present internally forms to vine while working towards the fields of flowers it waters for your reality externally. — For self, we must learn a type of inner peace that grants our realities the way we love self without ego and judgment. Prosperity is what you unconditionally love to perceive it to be, while having unjudged gratitude for what you love it to become. —Now breathe in all that is deserving of self presently while you exhale what you wish to let go presently.