Melody of Being Animate:Poetry

It’s over a year old and still makes sense. How do we make sense of love? | note sure just read:2023 (Actually <edited> 22 May 2023) me: oh thats today, great! *adds to time stamp Also me: Oh, not today okay cool.

Chaotic sweet melodic voice that finds its way into dreams in the deep blue black silvering nights, did she ever tell you why she knows the whisper of your heart calling their name will not let you rest until they have heard you speak your mind say love I have come to tell you about a feeling unmatched that have been keeping light awake in the early night, yet — here we are, everytime you close your eyes we see to cross paths you hear the most life has a ways of putting us on pause we do not like the disturbances but we appreciate the visits after us, asking you have you understood the significance of its affairs I want to tell you about a love story so kept it felt itself to share, I talk about love but I do not talk about being loved I wait in silence I am afraid of the times giving and the hearts spent giving out chances like they were wild sunflowers growing in my garden, my home, a safe haven I still think about the moments in memories astounded that this is what you might just be, — isn’t potential a funny word, I could ask when loving became this challenging but I already know the answer to that, speaking to you like this has never been easy I imagine you as we were the clouds, and the blue sky and the stars in the night hidden in the day light awake just a fall asleep with the rise your voice your eyes your hand holding mine feels like an intimate scent familiar, here, that I can never forget no matter how hard I have tried I wonder, when you question love what does that mean, it’s confusing being filled with emotional logic, it’s confusing making sense of words such as love whelmed like they’re so close like you could touch them, —close your eyes, and smell it whisk the air beside you but you know it’s more than that, this does not have an adequate meaning, Love is an ambiguous compassion, it’s not something that can be understood apart from the two individuals involved humorous isn’t it that love can make take on any shape desires, any form but also special, almost heroic, almost, — brilliant.

Poetry: Melody of Being Animate

Energetic conversations. | 30/9/20

Variations on love, I forgot about you one time, this was the most difficult way I learnt the care in loving you, they mention that distance knows no love not felt, in my Solus about you I filled it with so much silence because I wanted to, we show our chaos shambles of understanding each others efforts, we separate to heal our own inflicted wounds, we caused our pain, this love, because we chose not to believe in its healing, we grew the distance between us some more, do we admit we are as it be until we are as messed up as love — for love, when pain flowers love it becomes a sole garden without knowing bodies binding our hearts, blinded, we do not want to see that this too harbors love powerless — instinctively, we think to admit do our lovers ever really morn moaning our name under their breath to preserve us or let us go, when we settle with our heart we imagine who died in us first was it you or love, the innocence is the best lie about love as an old soul, the flowing magic of being human into love is probably the most honest way to begin to admit to love in the first place (don’t you agree love…)-. We remember words so much our acute eye for actions is almost to a fault — love loves logically and love loves emotionally, actions and words alert the body to love yourself everyday at 5 to 5, divinity asks, does looking for love when you are looking for love count as love, or are we just starved for its tastes, why must we always question affection this way, have we learnt nothing to impact without the lesson, the teaching of our pride will be our greatest revolution, our succumbing to our souls trusting our intuition will be our ultimate test into self love separated yet again, our understanding of love must come from here-. My child, it never really goes away does it? The love always finds a way to restore its self from inside of you, there is no one dumber nor smarter than a being in love, be observant of how you stream through screaming walks of life, I think the pain I feel when I explain liars in my mist is the same as a heart break, find her they’ll say, tell all the guards she is grounded from her heart the only love she is allowed to have is her own until she has broken here her own heart, a joker, the punch line was you not love, a joker, should I just also do nothing and wait, I mean won’t you tell me where is this downfall, here waiting or doing nothing, I did not know this is also love, point taken shuffling the notes realizing they were scrambled to mean a gift you give yourself, talking out loud in your head or in real time is strange but not as uncommon as you think it to actually be, don’t raise your voice at your heart, your mind has been watching you play out this sorry attempt to prove normalcy it is beyond you-. I have found out another buried secret, that I am always miffed at love, I will never always know it’s secrets to the hold it has on lovers, sitting here thinking I am spent at myself, — shocker you’re in love, yet again, what is different this millennia.

Poetry: Melody of Being Animate

332 333 pm let her go, it’s okay. You’re more than ready now. | 30/8/20

Life here, — has been droll, I am breaking down identity, shuttering it’s prideful benevolence has become fun, I feel beside myself with fearless humble, trying to see where it fits into my character here, the moments of pure joy in my childhood are spent with my siblings my heart learns to center around these moments like metaphors and real that rhyme with all that’s right here in these memories with moments such as these and real, a lifetime I will hold dear a love I am in tears about I have so much to be grateful when I sit by my window watching the swinging trees rippen about to bloom in the month of Spring-, as an adult, you start to wonder more and more into experiences passed, ask your body, search for the point outside you how this shipped your perception of what it means being a human living in the now human experience, you get undying about understanding how life plays you, fool upside down tower and real, you start to look at everything you have ever thought to have known remarkably enlightened, a bitter sweet fruit that has learned to bare it’s roots nourishing your sharpened mind, giving much need water to your loving heart, when you find yourself making footsteps to your bed closing the door behind you wondering how much of the past you have left behind along with that sign like a sword above your door a protector of compassionate beings, they might never understand your loyalty and you will tell them yes, how can you when all you choose to focus on is the passion without the knowing of its love — you think about the things within in you that bring forth absolute sun that come sole from you, remember how it felt to be happy here, that feelings consume time when you realize you have been doubting worth of worthy so long you fooled yourself into a form spoken for without your cat suit on, you have outlived that body, step into your mind, smile with your heart and open your crown to your bodies rewarding capabilities, dream your dream, open and close your eyes, see your dream come to life with your hands, show your younger self all her hard work too began from her expression of expansion, that you will never forget her gift to you, all the nights she over shared with you was her cup overflowing with spring water, so much love just so you could see her one last time and learn to let her go, she was begging from the very beginning to be seen by you, when kin thought you to be trouble you cried about the tares you gave yourself here, when all you wanted was to be seen.

Poetry: Melody of Being Animate

Do you have soul. | 8.9.20

I have had it with all the silence around my memories jagged and mismatched remembering nights that left cold hearts unwavering, there has been a life lost here, when you shed yourself you’re pathing a purging of panicked bodies and heated souls, the emblem you carry here will show you vivid events about yourself that have bled to bless the surface world, it is never faint to calm your own demons when they are learning to breath here too, when we are learning to harmonize each other the collateral pieces of our identity past, present and future flying around us it is not easy to watch yourself break tirelessly the impact it leaves on the purest of hearts can be forced to damage the most careful of minds, still, — we are seeds humbled by softness, finding your soul in a soulless world occupied by bodies that do not know how to stand strong in their bright power is enough to make an eager soul claim a pain that can be felt from the souls of the feet to the crown of heads, as if humility and humor were to dabble meanings, loosing to love is about as funny as looking at a dead garden striped of it’s blossom and surviving just to breathe-, when did loving less becoming something to laugh bravely about, when you are lucky enough to meet a being bruised by love your voice emanating generosity will find its way full to one’s heart able to ease and use compassion with one’s mind, we do not take the goodness of this honeyed planet and turn it to sticks and stones, — we can all laugh about it when there is no humility present to hold us determined to our own outcast of ourselves, when blame has shifted it does not stop it’s next karma, how dear do you hold love, how much do you swear to protect love in laughing pessimists of the humility held into world’s present and apart, when does one stop to smell the flowers it has watched to witness a rebirth of the true power of love by gleaming it’s treasured hue having perspective in faith, a hopeful love is a lover in a moments memory of it’s past, present and future of love-. One does not know no bounds to mishandled bodies taught to taunt love even when it is sure love has taught more than it cares to admit, when we are humbled, perspective favors optimism in bodies rightfully thought to be held back by lessons that needed their attention to vine with faith restored into their playful hearts and beautiful minds. It was never about carelessness, it was about the company it invited to over stay it’s welcome.

Poetry: Melody of Being Animate

14.8.19 | Dove.

How do I love now, I write you into the places I have found you into my soul, a part of our whole, a beating heart that feels a lot like a home, its a lot like the way it feels watching the rain, its something like finding a whole that speaks my love language and we match intensities, that part might just be the water Venus in me, its nothing like these flowers, I need a worthy flame to match, its being able to surrender to the air around me and liking it, the way it feels with you is the same as when I get to spend the day with my soul surrounding myself with my favorite words, its the feeling of the days where I am silly happy for no tangible reason, moments where I understand the feeling of touch, and stop making love out to be so matter of fact, truth is love isn’t always as logical as we may love it to be, when emotions are involved no matter how much we fight its feeling it will still rise the only way it knows how best, honestly, my love is how it feels to kiss you without any fear, how it feels when you take my hands into yours, its looking into each others souls, loving is knowing my worth is matched in energy and high vibration, they say the way law of attraction works is easy, yet I’m not sure its so easy to know what you want and know what you’re willing to love about souls no matter how much you realize you fill each other, maybe this is also part of being enough into love, I guess I understand that a love connection is something like creating a whole with each others honest selves, like a whole new world, like hearing words like we belong together spoken out loud and remembering that love could be centered at courage.

Poetry: Melody of Being Animate

 3.7.17
As women (we are more than..)

As a black woman I am many things, I rest on my mothers shoulders and bare her hurt from the bloodline of Ethiopia to Nairobi Kenya, I watch her and see myself in her eyes, her mahogany is validation of my own inner beauty she has given me so much to be kind and content when it comes to soul searching identity, she is both mother and hero as I chalk mark her attempts to piece back what she thinks she has lost, her hands tired from all they have cradled, when I look at our generation of women I witness the pliers of new entirety, the crater of fight we have to slowly digest, we are the announced generation that can not be subsided to calm, jaw words that will save us, this bitter sweet narrative never conditioned, unwavering influence that has been evolved by womanhood before us, have always been this kind of fierce hero, proud to call this type of super human part of this reality that we are shifting norms and giving misogyny something to externalize, teaching ourselves that we have always been our mothers (woman), unapologetically drafting our own affiliates, when I look at the women who have surrounded me with intuition I am able to witness both a fire and a flower, learning them as women whom ash systematic norms to blue flames, flourish and unapologetic to the beauty in our being which means to grow roots beneath this kind of flower, there is no momentum scandalous enough slow this pace hero built into our womanhood, we are the systems protagonist done so well we are teaching each other how to slow burn fires in the form of love and growth with this beautified integrity.

Poetry: Melody of Being Animate

21.02.17 | Feminism (anthem)

I wanted to write something for girls who care too  much, for girls who fear too much n so much more, I wanted to write a space for them, to help free their story, I wanted this space to be for them to reconnect with each other, with themselves, I fear too often for girls who can’t tell the difference between love n loved, those who give away their hearts to boys who are not worthy of their crowns, taint n easily make more then enough room for doubt in the form of black holes, that they attempt to conceal although too clumsy, fall too easily n mistake a knife for a king, watch how their heart whispers heart beats, blur the lines for their body, their mind is no where to be found, consumed by his sugar cane, I fear too much for girls, our girls that are growing up in a world where their body is still something that is up for discussion, that they have to go through life with a man telling them the rights to their own, don’t know that they had, they have a choice, this whole time, I wanted to write this for girls, for queens, for the women who are the gift that helped birth this nation, I wanted to write a space for them, ask all the right questions n allow their stories to be heard, I wanted them to see the love of feminism in all its tints, that this kind of love is an anthem sang for their broken, their hurt, their anger, their tears, despite such uncanny, this anthem is sang for their accidental however always unapologetic happiness.